spokes of spoken and unspoken.

In my mind, I crossed a shallow stream.
Then went on to read a poem:

A woman was writing about her sister
getting ready for bed across the room,
in depths of golden half light.

( When you are trying to read mood,
and there is silence, slow movements;
do you trust eyes or mouths ? )

After that, in another there were :
"Diaphanous" clouds .
(Giant ships on channels of air,
Light and shadow. Lots of time.
Clouds over grass and flowers,
clouds over rivers, reflecting sky.)

On to weather: Northern hemisphere,
Jet stream.
Northwest to southeast,
South west to northeast.

And then letter "O"
That sewed the tapestry back together.
Moods, mouths, clouds, reflection,
direction,floating,flow.

The journal pages began to fill
moon, over silvery gorse,
open windows, double doors.

Swallows, bowls, books,
origins in Volcano's.
crescendos, solo, trio,
festooned -and- tug o' war...

Witness

-->

“Come and see !” Gail grinned,

pulling me away from weeding

through blue and yellow heat

along a grassy track into the woods

Until we saw him: Beak wide open,

one wing draped down ,

A young red tail hawk, in dappled light.

“He’s learning to fly” I whispered,

She left behind a small tin of water.

"55" Sunday framed (may 21)

It may not be the final version yet- but working copy enough to share at least.

Sunday sermon comes on low
murmurs of the kitchen radio
cabled deep from a world war
twining coffee steam head to heart,
drifting westward to a dim green counter
chrome edge pointing to an open window
and a porch shading morning's
bright promise a red roan horse
walking way beyond triple strands of wire.

Recent Afternoon 55's

Green hill of friends yard
brushing face of cement steps

boys loop bikes in street
I hose and stir quick cement

below cars come and go
young man grinds a panel

trowel drags a dry twang
old maple stretches over all

remote control cars pop wheelies
old three bay garage gapes
tools gather with dinner scents

New morning, new meditaion.

I got pretty frustrated looking to 'Read a Meditation, online this morning. I did not want :
to BUY a meditation book, program, CD, Or read about how to meditate....It took several attempts re-arranging words for the search- so I didn't get as far as eliminating other
factors... What came up is appropriate though :

"...The parable of the talents. Here you have three men with different gifts. A talent was originally a coin or a weight, but through this parable it acquired the general meaning of a gift or an aptitude with which each of us is endowed. Some have more gifts than others - that is obvious. People have different temperaments, some more optimistic than others, a more or less attractive personality, more or less brains, a stronger or sicklier body, more or less beautiful hair, skin, face, body, and so on. Jesus is saying: Use everything you are given. Live your life to the full. Do not hide away the gifts the Lord gave you, whether of personality or of brains or whatever. The biggest tragedy is a life unlived. The fact that you are endowed in a different way from your brother or sister or parents or friends, does not mean that you should hide away the abilities and personality you have. Use it to the full for other people. The central message is the real explanation: use everything you are given." ( Sacred Space, homepage)

Do we earn these talents ? I do not believe they are random- however I do not believe we are only here once, either...
As a young child there was a great deal of hustle, bustle, travel and challenges. I remember many different people in and out of our home. There was -it seems now-a lot of: all or nothing too. You were 'On' or 'Off'. In company, or alone.
Getting older, there was: School. My first experience was a French school, in NY. - Why ?
My Mother had been raised with the admiration of all things French. I do not mind that-
Bi-lingual is good ! However THIS child, felt trapped. Helpless...
So-Shut up & watch-became my modus operandi . However that only works to a certain point.
When you cannot understand the instructions a teacher is giving-So- her experiment did not succeed. She never gave up on the 'French'- but I went to a regular School after that.
The Watch and Listen approach, test the proverbial waters, has stayed with me...Expect
trouble ? no. But caution and assessment, yes. Even reticence.
That was learned. Natural abilities ? Fairly coordinated, pretty smart. The problem I ran into was "competition" You have to continually strive : Better, smarter, quicker, brighter more popular,creative...And Then: Be Ready For Anything !!! (at a moments notice.)
"Put her on the next plane to-" Happened a lot. Back then 'Stewardesses' - would often guide
a child off a plane ( name and destination pinned to your coat) and wait with you until the connecting party showed up for you, at the gate...hard to believe ? Well it taught you to pay attention. ( I had a furrowed brow from an early age.) Looking back it made you realize
you were responsible. How far, how much ? You did whatever you could, as much as you could.
(The program says " Ability to respond" Phew- I did that.) Bottom line: safety, survival.
So as an adult- or trying to be, you look at interests, weigh aptitudes, examine history and experience. Thank heaven we can take a 'fearless and thorough inventory'. I never thought of it in that way- I always approached it from you are going on a journey, you need to pack: first went the books, etc. Then " How long is it for ? how warm is it ?" As a kid people I was staying with often had limited info to give me... So you wing it. bring essentials.Today I make sure that
means practical comfortable, too.I had to carry whatever I brought, so one suitcase, maybe
a tote.
I guess I got pretty fed up with 'competition'. Today my life has as many natural elements in
it as possible. I work in the service industry, more word of mouth than "advertisement".
I try to keep my eye open for the 'kid with the furrowed brow' !

Naturalized

All of 'our' properties have had inclinations toward the wild.
Sometimes it has been a matter of necessity to carve out areas for barns, sheds, gardens, parking-
20+ years ago I was on a hunt for shelter; and because of budget restraints
was gifted with the opportunity to reclaim an abandoned homestead.
The powers that be, considered it a" Camp " at best. No matter !
At the time I 'believed' I was young enough to cope-
I asked for help from friends, family and banks. I got quite a bit from each.
Overall it was a mess. No water except springs, no electric, septic...
It had experienced several fires, graffiti, & much weather .
It was set on ledge, bordered by stone walls. It had the beginnings of 2 dirt
tracks into the interior.
Compromise, patience and endurance brought it and myself, to a much
improved state.Vision certainly helped! It remains a primitive place,
however it provided me with all the basics .
Then we decided to take a chance on larger, more open property .
Compromised on the dwelling-inherited much water...Built another barn.
Put up a lot of pasture. Made a bigger vegetable garden. The ultimate downfall
was location and taxes...
We moved east. Chose a newer home, again on a hill !
It had lovely ponds and quitea bit of land with decent soil.
Not much else. We built another barn, paddocks, & garden.
Each time Mother Nature has ringed us with her beautiful, unaltered self.
Trees and wildlife have been allowed to trespass as need be.
We only strive to co-exist. Time has tempered our efforts
at ' boundaries'.
Our last, latest move- has been for economic reasons.
A little closer to amenities-stores and gasoline-even within striking distance
of a highway! It has been a good choice. Enough property and privacy
to sustain yet another barn, pastures and garden!
Charm is probably the best description for this "Cottage".
I am not a fan of Capes. Yet here we are-each of our homes has been
beautiful in its own particular way. Have we optimized it ? I like to think so.
Could we do better ? Surely- with more dollars to spare, yes indeed.
Am I satisfied ? Well- I push forward- I aim higher.
How far will that take us ? I will let you know,
" Hands to work, hearts to God-"